Renaissance Dad: Preparing for the Teenage Apocalypse (Or, “There Oughta Be an App”)

Renaissance Dad: Preparing for the Teenage Apocalypse (Or, “There Oughta Be an App”)

As a young family man, I often fantasized about the kind of father I would be as my daughter grew older.

I would be in my study, typing away on my vintage Smith-Corona typewriter, finishing my next bestselling novel, and there would be a polite knock at my door. Setting down my Hemmingway hand knurled pipe and straightening my tie, I would say, “Come in.”

The door would open, my teenage daughter would peek her head in and ask, “Is this a good time, Daddy? Mother ran to the store to pick up your favorite ice cream and I need some advice.”

I would smile and nod in a wise fatherly fashion. “Of course, my dear, come in and have a seat in one of the over-stuffed antique leather chairs!”

She would softly close the door behind her, take a seat and wait in respectful silence while I relit my pipe and leaned forward, resting my hands lightly on the surface of my polished oak writing desk.

(As you might have guessed, we watched a lot of re-runs when I was a kid.)

Fast forward a dozen years. My baby girl is now teetering precariously on the brink of the teenager apocalypse, and I am reluctantly facing the reality that I may need to . . . adjust some of my preconceived notions.

Read the rest of this article in the full digital issue below.

Perry P. Perkins is a third-generation chef, award-winning writer, and culinary instructor. He lives with his family in Longview, and operates the MY KITCHEN Outreach Program, for at-risk and under-served youth. His writing has appeared in numerous publications, including sixteen “Chicken Soup for the Soul” anthologies. He is also a reoccurring guest-chef on AM Northwest. More of Perry’s work can be found on Amazon at, and his cooking blog at

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